dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
