Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
should my penis look like a turkey
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
