I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
