You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Randomize
