Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
