after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
