The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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