Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
