Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
