Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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