Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Still dying that you shit outside
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid