I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize