At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Randomize
