That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize