felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Randomize
