omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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