So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
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Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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