if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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