Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
