What should our trivia night team be named?
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?