Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Sober January is a disaster.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
