I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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