I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
