Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Randomize
