I love black thongs
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
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