Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Randomize
