I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
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