to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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