whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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