What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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