Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
i was born a porn star she said
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
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