Farmville is her only friend.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Randomize
