worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
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