My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
i wish my penis had a tongue
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
