She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
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