note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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