couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize
