Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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