We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I skipped work to stalk him.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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