Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
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