When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
he's gonorrhea incarnate
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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