I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I wish you could order shots online.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize