no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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