Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
