it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize