Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Randomize
