She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
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