You just made me feel so damn special
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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