its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
