this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
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