Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
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critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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