I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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