If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
